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A real soul mate would not set you on the sidelines. How can you be sure whether you’re the only “other woman” he has? She’s been married to him for however many years, cleaned up after him when he’s sick, raised children with him, sacrificed with him, dealt with the “damn dailies,” then you come in at the 11th hour and provide a contrast to that that’s new, and exciting and fun. It is no different than breaking into their house and stealing their things.